Saturday, June 28, 2008

Thoughts While Driving Home From Oregon

1. I've heard that some people know instinctively if their lives will end early. Some people just know they're not going to last long. I wonder if Jonathan Larson was one of those people. And if he was, I wonder if facing his mortality helped him to get "Rent" out of his head and onto paper. Because if it did, I would consider trying to get in touch with my own mortality a little bit better, even though it scares me. And I'm not even hoping for "Rent," per say, I think I'd be happy if I could come up with some original "La Vie Boheme."

2. There's signs all along the freeway warning cars not to pass snow plows on the right. I catch myself thinking that maybe they should take all the signs down and let natural selection take care of that problem. I bet that way we could give out some more Darwin Awards.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Weekend Plans

Talking to Jay yesterday:
Me: "I want to do something new and fun this weekend. Something we've never done before that will be soul-reviving."
Jay: "Like, playing Grand Theft Auto?"

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Corrected

The family was outside while Jay was setting up his new grill, and Kameryn was entertaining herself running around jumping on leaves that were blowing in the wind and constantly asking what things were. She walked up to a wooden telephone pole and asked, "What's that?"
"Um, a pole." I answered.
"NOOO." She corrected. "It's a TREE!"
I don't know WHERE she gets the attitude OR the smart-ass-ness from. At least she's confident!

Saturday, June 07, 2008

Tagged

My friend Abby tagged me to do this post, and since I'm usually horrible with actually doing these things I thought I'd give it a try.

JOYS:
1. Hearing Kameryn talk. Even though a lot of what she says is "Go Away!" and "Stop it!", it makes it worth it to wake up in the morning and hear her say, "Hi Mama!" or tell me she loves me too.
2. Getting to be with Jay when we can just sit and BE without having to be anywhere or worry about Kameryn. It's not too often we can do it in our lives right now, and when it happens it recharges my soul. Honestly.
3. Seeing sweet baby Reagan in ultrasounds. I'm awed by how perfect she is and I love when Jay can see how often she kicks and rolls. It makes me feel validated and is the closest I can come to sharing that part with him. Plus, at our last ultrasound the tech took 5 pictures, and three of them were of Reagan's face. When she realized it, she apologized and said, "Your baby is just so beautiful, I kept taking pictures of her! I couldn't help myself!

FEARS:
1. Death. My own or anyone I care about. I don't like talking about it, and if Jay brings it up, he can tell you it takes me about 3 seconds to start crying.
2. Not accomplishing my goals.
3. Being a bad mom. I don't want to let my kids down by not teaching them what they need to know.

GOALS:
1. Letting my kids know constantly how much I love them.
2. Owning a house one day. And right now that day seems very very far off.
3. Going to Scotland, and hopefully taking a tour of Europe in general, before I die.

CURRENT OBSESSIONS/COLLECTIONS:
1. Barack Obama. I love his speeches, I love hearing what he has to say, and right now I'm trying to read one of the books he's written, "The Audacity Of Hope." I feel a little bit like a poser, though, since the book is about politics and thus makes references to politicians and I have no idea who he's talking about. And in order to help get certain points across he uses sports metaphors. So I'm lost on both counts.
2. I have a blank book that I bought recently and I'm using it to write down things I hear or read that make me happy or mean something to me. I have quotes, poems, and Obama speeches written in there so far. And it has pictures of coffee on the front, which also makes me happy.
3. Facebook. That's an obsession I'm not as proud of, but an obsession nonetheless since I check it constantly. Constantly.

RANDOM SURPRISING FACTS:
1. Growing up my two best friends both wanted to be surgeons, and I was the one who wasn't at all interested because I didn't like the idea of blood or shots or pain in general. The reason I went to Medical Assisting school was because I was out of work for a little while and when I checked the job listings in the newspaper there were always a ton for Medical Assistants. Now I love my job more than anything, it suits me perfectly.
2. I don't know my right from my left. I have to look at my hands, or really concentrate to figure that one out. I have only recently learned North, South, etc., and that only works HERE, put me anywhere else and I'm totally lost. Without Jay, I don't think I'd be able to get from here to there.
3. I'd love to write something and get it published before I die. Ideally something like "To Kill a Mockingbird", but even a poem or short story would work. I'd love to leave some piece of myself behind when I go.

And now I'm supposed to tag 5 people to do this post, but since I am so bad with it myself I'm not gonna try to pass it on. If you're interested, it's kinda fun.