When I Listen To My Heart:

My answer can be found here.

Reagan: One Month Old

What Are You Doing This Fall?

My answer can be found here.

Two Babies

I was really nervous about how Kami would react to having a new baby around. Some advice I got on the topic was that I should buy Kami a new doll at the same time I brought the baby home and I should encourage her to take care of the doll the same way that I took care of the new baby to help Kam feel included.
After we brought Reagan home Kami handled it so well that I didn't bother with getting her a doll. However, she adopted a new baby of her own, and I introduce to you, Baby Monkey. And yeah, Kami chose that name.

When Kameryn wakes up, the first thing she wants to know is where her Baby Monkey is. She carries him around, changes his diaper, lets us know when he's crying, feeds him a bottle and, as weird as it sounds, pretends to breastfeed him. She says, "Look Mommy! Two babies!" And then she will point out that I've got MY baby,

And she has her baby.

I'm actually really proud of her for finding a way to deal with what's going on. And, as a bonus for me, I use Baby Monkey to help me get Kameryn dressed, saying I'll dress her after Kameryn puts her clothes on. So really, everybody wins!

What Do You Appreciate Most About America?

I don't know how to link back to Flickr, but that is where I got the picture from. I would love to get help from anyone who understands how to link back so I can do it in the future.

The Pink Princess

Kameryn hates getting dressed. I always have to brace myself when the time comes to put clothes on her, because some of the worst temper tantrums so far have come about because we dress her. We've learned that the rest of us have to be ready to walk out the door so that we can hurry and put clothes on Kameryn and leave before she has a chance to rip them off again.
Yesterday right before we were supposed to leave to go to my in-laws for dinner I was mentally preparing myself to get Kameryn dressed. And then she ran up to me in clothes that she had put on herself, and she was thrilled.

Yes, that's my tank top. And, faced with the decision of taking the tank top off of her and changing her into something else or letting her wear the tank top up to her grandparents house, you better believe I tightened the tank top up in the back with a hair tie and put her in her car seat.
And you will notice that she was so convinced she was a princess in a princess dress that she even has the pointed toe to prove it.

A Scrapbook of her First Week

My Beautiful New Girl

I'm awake while my baby is asleep. I'm breaking the golden rule of being a new mom because #1. Reagan slept through the night last night, so I've gotten plenty of sleep and #2. Because things thus far have been so perfect, it's hard not to be awake and in anticipation of what's going to happen next.
This all happened a bit differently than I was expecting. I started having contractions Wednesday morning at about 4am, but they were still the "Oh! There's a contraction, how fun! Let's wait and see when the next one is, Oh! I hope it's soon!" kinda contractions. I will never forget when I had those going into labor with Kameryn, I called my mom and told her excitedly that "We might have a baby in April after all, I'm feeling some contractions!" And she said, "It's probably not labor, then, Kjersti, because no one is excited about those contractions!" And I had Kameryn two days later, and man, my mom was right.
So after falling asleep in between contractions for the next couple hours, I prepared myself for the next couple days, thinking it would be about that long until we got to meet our little girl. At 6 I woke up to use the bathroom and saw blood. Not a ton, but enough to make me panic and head straight to the phone to call Dr. Allie. Pregnancy has made me appreciate having Dr. Hanna only a call away, no matter the time of day, so thanks for that Allison! And Allie told me I needed to go get checked out.
I called Jay at work and said what are apparently the magic words, "I'm bleeding" because he was home not 5 minutes later throwing a bag together and pushing me out the door so we could head to the hospital. At that point I was the one saying, "Jay, calm down, it's no big deal." I thought they were going to send us right back home, and I would have the reassurance that everything was fine but I still had some time to do what I had planned before the baby actually came. We drove to the hospital joking about my contractions and planning on picking up some breakfast on our way back home. Outside the hospital I had a contraction that made me stop walking, but Jay cracked a joke and I laughed the entire way through the contraction, despite it hurting. So this couldn't really be it, right?
We walked in and got taken back to a room almost right away, and the nurse came in to check me. I was dialated to a 2, but 80% effaced, so they said that they would check me again in an hour. The hour passed quickly, we watched some TV and my contractions got worse. She came back in and checked again, and I was dialated to a 2.5, so she said she would wait another hour and check again. Not wanting to be sent home, Jay and I decided to start walking around the hospital. We overheard that every labor room in the hospital, 30 total, was full, and it was about 9am. So I was hoping for the contractions, but they also were getting passed the "Oh, how fun!" stage. In fact, Jay kept having to remind me to breathe through them instead of holding my breath, and it made me mad enough that all I could manage to say was, "DON'T tell me to breathe!"
When she checked again she said what we had been waiting to hear: That we could stay. I would've been happier, but the contractions were coming just a couple minutes after each other by that point, and it was hard to focus on much of anything. The nurse offered a pain med, which I accepted, and I now I am a firm believer in the magic of Fentanyl. She said it wouldn't stop the pain, it would just take the edge off, but after she gave it to me I was telling Jay how much I loved him and how good I now felt. I love the stuff.
And then, not too much later, the anesthesiologist came in to give me my epidural. He was a good guy, and though he had a little trouble getting it in, it wasn't bad. I had been a little scared for that part, but luckily it turned out to not be a big deal, and thankfully afterwards I couldn't feel my contractions at all. And then we just had to wait.
Danae, Allison and Mom all came after noon and kept me company. I swear after that my nurse must've been convinced that all of us were crazy, especially when they made up an instant song about Patossin. Then, at 3, we were ready. The family took bets on how long it would take for Reagan to make her appearance, and Allison suited up to catch the baby and catch her cord. Three pushes later, my baby was here. I've been dreaming about that moment, the one when you've delivered the baby and you get to see her for the first time, and there's really no way to describe it when they put a perfect, beautiful little girl in your arms. And my little girl looks so much like her sister.

My mom told me that I would be amazed to see Kameryn after having Reagan because you get to realize how much they've grown up. When we went to my recovery room my in-laws were there with Kameryn, and it was just how my mom described it to see my other daughter up, walking around and talking to "Steve" on the cell phone. And I did get a huge dose of amazement about how much she's grown as while she was talking on the phone she said, "Steve, I need to borrow money, yo." I swear, I don't know where she learned that!
I was worried about Kameryn and how she would react to the baby, but she has taken it beautifully. She loves Reagan and wants to be close to her, and in the hospital when the nurses would come in to take her vitals she would tell them "Don't touch her!" until we explained that they were being nice and helping the baby. Anytime they took her out of the room to the nursery, Kameryn would mope and cry.

I'm not usually the type, but it makes me wonder if they've known each other before. In a way, it almost feels like Kameryn has been waiting for Reagan to get here.
Jay is amazing with Reagan. I love to watch them together.

So, that's the story. I know that the baby blues may still be making their appearance, and I know that I'm sure to be overwhelmed and wonder what I've gotten myself into, but even with all of that I'm so grateful for my family and excited to see us grow together.

Life With a 2 Year Old: An Actual Conversation

Jay: "Do you want to watch the doggie and the cat?" Translation: Milo and Otis.
Kameryn: "No, the doggie and cat and pig."
Jay: "Okay, do you want to watch the movie with the doggie and cat and the pig?"
Kameryn: "No, the doggie and cat and pig SLEEPING."
Jay: "Do you want to watch the movie with the doggie and the cat and the sleeping pig?"
Kameryn: "NO, the doggie and the car and the cat and the pig sleeping."
Jay, probably feeling a little like he's playing "This is the House that Jack Built": "Okay, do you want to watch the movie with the doggie and the car and the cat and the pig sleeping?"
Kameryn: "....Yes. PLEASE?"

Keeping It Simple

Lately I'm really trying to slow down and appreciate my life the way it is now, since there's a giant countdown to the day my life will change again forever, and that day isn't too far off. I'm really trying to appreciate the time I have with Kameryn, just her and me. She's getting so big and so smart and can say so much that I know it's going to be hard starting over again with a newborn. I know my sweet girl will help me all she can, though, and while I know that she's going to be jealous sometimes, I think over-all she's going to be an amazing big sister. I hope it can develop into a type of relationship like Wes and Allie have, just without the bottle stealing.

Tonight it was fun putting Kameryn in the "tubbit," which it the word she has invented for the tub, and we don't quite know why she adds the extra syllable. Tonight she was singing a song about getting into the tub, which sounded a lot like, "Tubbit! ad dah and a ma Soap! an bah and a Water! a la and a Bubbles!" I was using a rag to get her hair wet while she was playing her usual game of "Throw the Soap in the Tub and then dig through the bubbles to find it" and she got mad at me. "No hair wet, Mommy!" And then she took the cup we have in there for her, filled it to the top and dumped the water on her head. Totally shocked by what she had done to herself, she sat there panting a little bit, and then yelled, "I DID IT!" and started laughing. Her sweet little stories make me so happy. And I know that soon I'm not going to remember really well what life was like before Reagan, but when I do, I hope it's the fun stories like this I remember best, even though they're simple.

The 4th of July

Since I don't have Chelsee's mad photography skills, and because it's hard to get two babies to look hold still, let alone both look at the camera, I know my pictures aren't the best. It documents more the fact that we were there, and doesn't really show how much the kids liked the fireworks. But they did both (mostly) enjoy them, besides Isaac getting a little scared at the loud ones, and Kameryn paying more attention to the "baby flag" than the actual fireworks sometimes. Isaac liked to say "All gone!" Once the firework was over.

Being Stubborn

So, there are some facts I know about myself. One is that once I make a decision, good or bad, I tend to jump in with both feet. Only after I've given something my all do I really step back to decide if it was a good decision or not.
Another thing I know about myself is that if you approach me in the wrong way, even with good advice, my impulse is to rebel. My dad told me once I have a "Yes or No" personality, and when I have a hard time seeing the gray areas to things, and this is a time I know he's right. If you push me too hard one way, I like to go to the other extreme. It may be childish, and I totally acknowledge that, but it doesn't make it any less true.
I would like to think the beautiful part about friendships is that they're genuine. And when someone tells me that I need to be friends with this person or that person OR ELSE, it doesn't make me want to embrace the person at all. It makes me want to avoid them. And if my intentions are miscommunicated, it doesn't mean that they're not good intentions.
Maybe I should think twice before I work in an office full of girls again.

Hormones

I'm not exactly sure what it is, but lately I think I'm finally starting to grasp the fact that I'm pregnant again. A little late, right? I know it. I don't know what caused the change, exactly. It could be that I'm starting to pop out of all my clothes, or that the baby is big enough that she can make my whole belly shake when she moves, and she moves ALL THE TIME. It could be that I got my first presents for the baby. (Thanks Wes and Elisabeth!) Whatever it is, I've gone completely into nesting mode. I can't get my apartment clean fast enough, and with how dirty our apartment usually is it doesn't happen fast at all, unfortunately. I did find a couple of helpful tips, for anyone who may be interested: The product I've found that gets marker off the walls? Hand Sanitizer. Works like a charm. I've heard that hairspray gets pen off, and I'm going to try that tonight. The dorkiest part is how excited that makes me.
Being pregnant of course comes with all the hormones, and I find myself loving and hating some really simple things. For example, I watched "Knocked Up" tonight and totally cried at the end. I also cry during dances on "So You Think You Can Dance." Anyone who doesn't has no soul. On the flipside, I've started to get annoyed with some random things. Like Sleeping Beauty. Okay, I love the movie as much as anyone else. But the witch casts the spell on her that "On her 16th birthday she'll prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel and die" Right? Yeah, has anyone SEEN Sleeping Beauty when she pricks her finger? Beautiful. Great body, perfect complexion. Does ANYONE actually look like that at 16? I don't think so. I sure didn't.
I also am paying much more attention to the kids songs we sing. Which in turn begs the question, who came up with Rock-A-Bye Baby? 'When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, and down will come baby, cradle and all.' Nice. So soothing, it's a wonder kids don't always go right to sleep. There's also "Ring Around the Rosies," which Kameryn's Grandma Ertmann taught her, and I still find it a little disturbing when she calls out "Ashes!" when she wants to play.
And a word to the wise, if anyone saw "Match Point" and liked it, avoid it while pregnant. I really liked it the first time around, and when I tried to watch it again I had to turn it off.
So there it is, a pregnant rant. And even if you don't get anything from the rest of the post, keep in mind the marker- hand sanitizer thing. That may come in handy.

Thoughts While Driving Home From Oregon

1. I've heard that some people know instinctively if their lives will end early. Some people just know they're not going to last long. I wonder if Jonathan Larson was one of those people. And if he was, I wonder if facing his mortality helped him to get "Rent" out of his head and onto paper. Because if it did, I would consider trying to get in touch with my own mortality a little bit better, even though it scares me. And I'm not even hoping for "Rent," per say, I think I'd be happy if I could come up with some original "La Vie Boheme."

2. There's signs all along the freeway warning cars not to pass snow plows on the right. I catch myself thinking that maybe they should take all the signs down and let natural selection take care of that problem. I bet that way we could give out some more Darwin Awards.

Weekend Plans

Talking to Jay yesterday:
Me: "I want to do something new and fun this weekend. Something we've never done before that will be soul-reviving."
Jay: "Like, playing Grand Theft Auto?"

Corrected

The family was outside while Jay was setting up his new grill, and Kameryn was entertaining herself running around jumping on leaves that were blowing in the wind and constantly asking what things were. She walked up to a wooden telephone pole and asked, "What's that?"
"Um, a pole." I answered.
"NOOO." She corrected. "It's a TREE!"
I don't know WHERE she gets the attitude OR the smart-ass-ness from. At least she's confident!

Tagged

My friend Abby tagged me to do this post, and since I'm usually horrible with actually doing these things I thought I'd give it a try.

JOYS:
1. Hearing Kameryn talk. Even though a lot of what she says is "Go Away!" and "Stop it!", it makes it worth it to wake up in the morning and hear her say, "Hi Mama!" or tell me she loves me too.
2. Getting to be with Jay when we can just sit and BE without having to be anywhere or worry about Kameryn. It's not too often we can do it in our lives right now, and when it happens it recharges my soul. Honestly.
3. Seeing sweet baby Reagan in ultrasounds. I'm awed by how perfect she is and I love when Jay can see how often she kicks and rolls. It makes me feel validated and is the closest I can come to sharing that part with him. Plus, at our last ultrasound the tech took 5 pictures, and three of them were of Reagan's face. When she realized it, she apologized and said, "Your baby is just so beautiful, I kept taking pictures of her! I couldn't help myself!

FEARS:
1. Death. My own or anyone I care about. I don't like talking about it, and if Jay brings it up, he can tell you it takes me about 3 seconds to start crying.
2. Not accomplishing my goals.
3. Being a bad mom. I don't want to let my kids down by not teaching them what they need to know.

GOALS:
1. Letting my kids know constantly how much I love them.
2. Owning a house one day. And right now that day seems very very far off.
3. Going to Scotland, and hopefully taking a tour of Europe in general, before I die.

CURRENT OBSESSIONS/COLLECTIONS:
1. Barack Obama. I love his speeches, I love hearing what he has to say, and right now I'm trying to read one of the books he's written, "The Audacity Of Hope." I feel a little bit like a poser, though, since the book is about politics and thus makes references to politicians and I have no idea who he's talking about. And in order to help get certain points across he uses sports metaphors. So I'm lost on both counts.
2. I have a blank book that I bought recently and I'm using it to write down things I hear or read that make me happy or mean something to me. I have quotes, poems, and Obama speeches written in there so far. And it has pictures of coffee on the front, which also makes me happy.
3. Facebook. That's an obsession I'm not as proud of, but an obsession nonetheless since I check it constantly. Constantly.

RANDOM SURPRISING FACTS:
1. Growing up my two best friends both wanted to be surgeons, and I was the one who wasn't at all interested because I didn't like the idea of blood or shots or pain in general. The reason I went to Medical Assisting school was because I was out of work for a little while and when I checked the job listings in the newspaper there were always a ton for Medical Assistants. Now I love my job more than anything, it suits me perfectly.
2. I don't know my right from my left. I have to look at my hands, or really concentrate to figure that one out. I have only recently learned North, South, etc., and that only works HERE, put me anywhere else and I'm totally lost. Without Jay, I don't think I'd be able to get from here to there.
3. I'd love to write something and get it published before I die. Ideally something like "To Kill a Mockingbird", but even a poem or short story would work. I'd love to leave some piece of myself behind when I go.

And now I'm supposed to tag 5 people to do this post, but since I am so bad with it myself I'm not gonna try to pass it on. If you're interested, it's kinda fun.

Look How Cool!

What Happens In Vegas...

There were a few things about Vegas I would've changed. It was HOT. Not nearly as hot as the first time we went down, but still too hot. Kami was all over the place, and as usual, she wouldn't eat anything. Well, not anything but butter and cream cheese.
But everything was worth it because I got to be there to see Allison walk across the stage. I was so proud of my sister and impressed by her accomplishments. She's a huge inspiration to me in regards to putting the time and work in to making what you dream turn into a reality. I love that she's moving home (into one of the cutest houses I've ever seen) so that I can be around her! I love you, Allison! Congratulations on kicking so much ass!

Reagan Mackenna

So, we went for another ultrasound today because Reagan was completely content to stay up under my belly button last time and as such there were parts of her anatomy, her heart specifically, that the doctor couldn't see. We went in today with a list of things they wanted to spot, and we got most of them. However, last time we couldn't get her to move, so this time we couldn't get her to hold still. And that seems to be the running theme with my girls thus far: Impossible.
I don't have a scanner to show good pictures of the ultrasound photos, but I'm excited enough about them that I've taken pictures of the pictures with my camera. Please forgive the quality and go straight to the oohing and aahing over what a perfect little girl we've got coming:
This is the baby's face. Today the doctor was checking for a cleft lip, and she said, "This baby has such beautiful lips, it's hard not to take 100 pictures of them!" Jay says she gets that from him, but come on, we all know who it really came from, right?
Here's a tiny foot.
And here's a beautiful arm and hand! Look at those bones! A mom couldn't ask for better bones!
And finally, a good strong heartbeat. Kameryn's heartbeat was something that we had to keep an eye on before she was born, so it's a relief to hear that this baby's heart is perfect so far!
Still, after taking all these pictures and also finding her femurs, kidneys, bladder and cord insertion there still were some pictures they weren't able to take since Reagan wouldn't hold still. They'd like me to go back in another month to look for the aortic arch and her brain, since they couldn't see either as well as they would've liked. As much as I would like her to cooperate, I can't say I mind getting to see her every few weeks! I'm completely excited to see her, and am starting to get impatient for her to make her arrival! And, if you're wondering, they estimate that right now she weighs about 1 pound, 6 ounces!

My Current Favorite Picture

Extreme Elmo, an Elmo easter basket (which she refused to use on Easter) and inside the basket, her baby Elmo. It gets a little redundant, but it totally worth it because of how happy it makes her.

So Smart

Yesterday Jay and Kami and me were all sitting outside enjoying the warm weather, and Kami was running around. Jay said, "Kami, are you excited for your new little sister?" And she yelled, "YEAH!" Jay asked her, "Where is your little sister?" And she ran up to me and pointed to my belly and said, "Right there!" And put her mouth up to my belly and said something I couldn't understand, then ran off again. We were both a little bit shocked because she hasn't shown us that she understands before, so Jay had her come and sit between us, and asked again, "Kameryn, where is your little sister?" "Right there." She said, and pointed to my belly again. I really can't underestimate her anymore. She knows what's going on.

An Interesting Conversation

Jay: " 'A Warm Place' makes me think that Trent Reznor could just do instrumentals for the rest of his life and still do well."
Me: "Yeah, but I'm glad that he doesn't."
Jay: "There's something about a good instrumental. Life needs more instrumentals. Sometimes life just has too many words."

More Proof

Even if you weren't sure they were related, you could just look at the hair and know.

Impatience

I had my big ultrasound appointment set up for April 22, and upon thinking about it further realized there was NO WAY I could wait that long to find out if we're having a boy or a girl. So I moved it up, and the new date is April 15 at 3:45. Yes, that is two weeks from today, and in my opinion, STILL too long to have to wait. Everyone, think "BOY!"

Love Letter, Month 23

This is my little girl that will be 2 years old in a month.Words are exploding out of her lately. It seems like every day she says something new, because she's been quiet for so long that now she wants to learn things as quickly as possible to make up for lost time. Now in addition to telling us what a horse, cow, bird, duck, cat and dog all say (which we knew she could do) she's started pointing out apples, saying "Ashes" when she wants to play Ring Around the Rosies, and calling Isaac "Baby."
A couple weeks ago Jay got me a Sprite from the gas station, and when he handed it to me in the car Kami reached her hands out for it and said, "Wah wah." We didn't know she could say that, and we didn't teach it to her consiously. And that's how it goes. She says more words everyday, and is even getting better at sentences.It's been fun getting to hear a little bit about what she thinks, and the other night, what she dreams. Kami has nightmares, and has for awhile, but the other night she was able to let us know a little bit about it. She said, "Ma," which is one of her Grandmas, I don't know which (not me because she STILL calls me Daddy.) She also said "House" and "Oh gosh! What do I do?" With her hands on both sides of her head. It was sad to see because she was so upset, but interesting to have an idea of what she dreams about. And, luckily for us, the phrase "Oh gosh" has replaced the other, less tasteful phrase she had picked up from me before. Kami loves to color and frequently fills up any paper she can find with spirals that she draws. I wouldn't be surprised if she goes on to be quite a little artist like her aunts and uncles and Grandma. I know she didn't get the drawing gene from me!Easter is a blast every year, because the way my mom sets it up is something you can't grow out of. This year the Grandkids got candy in the playroom that they got to collect on their own, and Kami got it this year. She filled up her basket with that candy, and then when the race started for the rest of us, Kami followed behind, still holding her basket and grabbed all the big candy bars out of the dining room. After that she followed me into the front room and helped me grab candy and put it in my basket. We didn't plan it, but it couldn't have worked any better even if we had.There was a day when I went to a scrapbook expo with Jay and Danae and the babies, and while we were driving it started to snow. I was wearing thin little ankle socks which got really wet, and by the time we got back to my mom's house I took off my socks and shoes hoping I would warm up faster. I don't remember saying anything to my mom about how cold I was, but while I was lying on her bed she came and put some thick, warm socks on me. It was a little gesture, but I was so grateful for it because I was so cold, and ever since then it's been an example to me of the kind of mom I want to be for you.
I really hope that I can raise you right and you can grow into a beautiful girl that knows how important and priceless you are. I hope that I can help you when you need me, and sometimes anticipate what you might need even if you can't tell me. I'm so proud of you, and I can't wait to watch as you learn more. I know you're going to be a great big sister, and you enrich my life in a way that I doubt I could ever explain, but am so grateful for. I love you, big girl.

First Looks

Since my Internet is FINALLY back up, I wanted to share some of the most important things that have happened to me lately. First of all, I went and had my first ultrasound on Feb. 5 and we got this first picture of our good-lookin' baby:
It's not the greatest picture in the first place and I know this is blurry, but the head is the circle that's the farthest left, and it's in a profile, and then the rest of his body goes to the right. (We don't actually know if it's a boy or a girl, it's too early for that, but we're hoping for a boy so we always say "he" when talking about our new baby.) She thought I was about 10 weeks 2 days at my appointment, which puts me at exactly 13 weeks today. We got to hear his heartbeat, which was good and strong, and when we saw him up on the monitor he was moving all around, kicking his arms and his legs! Even now, it's still surreal that we're gonna have a new addition to our family before long. My due date is Sept. 5.
I was really nervous at first about how Kameryn is going to react. She loves to be the center of attention. Something that's a huge comfort to me is how much she loves being around Isaac and how much fun they have together. Another thing that I've noticed lately is how nurturing she is with her toys. She got an Extreme Elmo for Christmas and now he and Mr. Quackers come with us everywhere we go. She loves when Elmo is in a high chair right next to hers, and when she watches Blue's Clues she always has them both close by and makes sure they're adequately covered with blankets.
So it's getting really exciting. I know it's also going to be really challenging, but I'm excited for our little family to grow.

A Quick Kameryn Update

I've completely slacked on doing my monthly love letters to my sweet girl the last few months, even though she learns something new and still amazes me with it everyday. Just quickly I wanted to write about some of her most recent accomplishments, though most of them are small, and I will post some pictures of her later on. I've been waiting to post until I had pictures to go along with it, but the "rechargeable" batteries in our camera refuse to charge so we don't have any.
Lately Kameryn is learning and saying a bunch of new words. Possibly her most recent is "Elmo," thanks in part to a daily dose of Sesame Street and in part to the Extreme Elmo Jay's brother got her for Christmas. She loves Extreme Elmo and carries him around with her, but when you press his belly he laughs and shakes AND, as if the laughing and pulsating weren't enough, he throws himself onto his back, kicks his legs, waves his arms and then stands himself up again. Every time he does it Kameryn feels bad for him, thinking he must be hurting himself, so she goes to great lengths to avoid his belly at all costs.
Possibly her favorite new word is "Blue," which she says constantly because she's developed a strong, personal love for "Blue's Clue's" the T.V. show. It was kinda cute at first, and now that she's watching the tapes several times a day and Jay and I both unconsciously sing the songs even when she's NOT watching it, it's not as cute anymore. There is one part in the main song that she sings along to, we know because he pauses several times and she pauses with him, and I am very proud of her because I take it as proof that she's got my sense of rhythm and not her dad's, which is better for everyone.
Yesterday I was asking Kami to point out Elmo's mouth and nose and eyes, and I knew she knows all of those plus she can point out ears and hair, but all the sudden Jay started asking her to point out her hands, fingers, feet, toes, and her knees. And SHE DID. I don't know where I've been, but I had no idea she knew all of that, and in addition, Jay and I don't know where she learned it from! She's definitely a smart one.
A couple nights ago Kameryn kissed my belly, out of nowhere. My thoughts that she'll be incredibly jealous of her younger sibling are still there, but I'm not as worried about it as I was at first. I'm getting excited, I think she'll love to have someone to play with and someone to teach things to. Someone to dance with.

Hoping to Return to Some Normalcy

I'm sorry it's been so long since I blogged. Things seem to keep coming up for me. December was crazy with Christmas crafts and my radiology exam, and after I had finally gotten those two out of the way I had a sick baby. Kameryn started throwing up a few days before Christmas, and was sick as a dog for the holidays. On Christmas morning she came out and saw the tricycle under the tree that Jay had stayed up putting together for her, and she had enough energy to walk up to it and push it across the room, but after that she laid down on the floor in the middle of the room and didn't move. She finally got over whatever bug she had last night, and we're hoping that can be her dose of sickness for the YEAR.

Also, before the new year I found out some good news: I'm PREGNANT again! I'm not very far along, probably only 6 weeks at this point, and I have to keep reminding myself of the fact at all because it doesn't seem real. My first appointment will be on Feb. 5 with Dr. Ponder (aka Dr. Hottie, so named by Allison and her friends) and I'm hoping that going to the doctor will help me realize what I'm in for. I am so excited, and taking my pills and vitamins as I should, but something about it still doesn't seem REAL.

Luckily, I haven't started getting sick yet, which is good. Probably inevitable, but nice that I have had some fair warning and know it's coming.

I haven't gotten my scores back from my Radiology licensing exam yet, but I'll update everyone as soon as I get them. Until then, I'll try to post more often.

One Step Closer to Radiating Your Bones...

I passed my test and have a heavy duty certificate to prove it! I'm not quite as excited about it as I should be because he had the class take the test, and then he had us grade our own tests, and without asking a single score he started handing out graduation certificates. He told us we needed 70% to pass, and I figured out later that I had gotten 80%, so I would've passed HAD he taken scores into account, but it just makes me nervous. I would be so humiliated if I went to take the Licensing test in a couple weeks and was totally stumped.
It was nice to take that certificate in to the doctor and have him look at it. He held it and read the whole thing and then asked where we should hang it. That was a good feeling.
SO, the real party is going to be after I take my test on the 27th. Wish me luck!

Catching Up

Today I take my class final, and if I get 70% or better I complete the class. If I get 69% or worse, I fail the class and waste the money generously given to me by Dr. P and mom. I've studied with Jay AND in a study group of 2 other classmates AND by myself, and I've gotten to the point that if I study anymore, it may do more damage than good, and thus, I blog. It's been awhile, and I'm throughly ready to be done with this class and this test. I almost can't wait until the blessed time when I drive away from the DATC for the last time. Only a couple more hours.

I've taken a few more X-rays since my last post. Some of them have been beautiful and helpful, and others...not so much. I took a chest X-ray for the doctor yesterday which turned out much too light. The worst part of taking a bad X-ray is I don't have a license to just go in and repeat it, so I have to wait for the doctor to come look at it and decide if it's worth doing again. So there I was, standing next to my pitiful X-ray, just waiting for him to walk up, knowing there would be much disappointment. And there was. He flipped the light on to look at the X-ray, and then flipped it back off and said, "See, it looks better that way!" I'm completely grateful that he's patient with me, and has a sense of humor about the whole thing.

Also, since I'm so good at celebrating holidays a month late on my blog, I share with you some pictures of Thanksgiving.
This is a classic example of Jay and my undaunted ability to over-do things. All this food was for 4 people. But man was it good.
Here are the kids on Thanksgiving. Sometimes it's still hard to believe how fast a year goes by.

In Other News

• Jay has returned to the blogging world, and you can check it out at jayertmann.blogspot.com

• My class final in Radiology is on the 13th of December, and I found out in my last class that that final that I've been stressing out about? Yeah, it's been in the back of my workbook this WHOLE time. I've been carrying it around with me since day one. So we get to study the ACTUAL test. Takes the stress off, but also makes me wonder how well prepared I'll be for my licensing exam.
• You know, that licensing exam that I scheduled yesterday. So I'll officially be taking the exam on Dec, 27th. I tried to get one before Christmas, but they were all booked. My printout reads, "Total test time: 220 minutes. Please arrive 30 minutes early." So I don't expect to be able to form coherent sentences afterward. And there may be drooling involved.
• I've taken two more X-rays at work since I last wrote about it, a chest and a foot. Didn't have to redo them. So now (with some help from Wesley) I can tell you I'm 5 for 7!
• Kami turned 19 months old on the 29th. A sappy love letter will follow shortly. Until then, please enjoy Kami in her Elton John/Harry Openhower sunglasses.
• 

***WARNING: ANGRY RANT****

****Okay, this is the second warning and my disclaimer: This will be an angry, bitching rant and I am unapologetic. If you are easilly offended, read no further. And with that, I'm off.****

I called my dad's cell phone from work to give him some blood test results. A woman answers the phone who's voice I don't recognize.
Me: "Is C. Hanna there?"
L: "No, he's out of town, but this is his niece and I can give him a message if you want."
(Um, what? My dad barely talks to his brothers and sisters, he didn't leave his cell phone with one of their kids. By this point I'm so confused that I need to clarify.)
Me: "Is this C. HANNA?"
L, thinking I'm asking if SHE is C. Hanna (DUH!) answers: "No, this is C. Hanna's daughter."
(UM, WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!)
Me: "No, I'M C. Hanna's daughter. WHO is this?"
L: "Oh, this is his step daughter L."

The conversation ends civilly at that point because I'm at work. Here are my thoughts that WEREN'T said during this conversation because I was at work, but should've been:
"No, actually you're NOT C. Hanna's step daughter because our parents aren't married. I know that because if they were, I'd want to kill myself. Oh, woops, not the right person to say that to. Here's a tip: If you want to identify yourself so we'll know who you are, you can simply say "I'm the loser slacker mooch that lives with your dad and is a total pain in his ass." THEN I'll know who I'm talking to."

My whole life I've been proud to be my dad's daughter. He would come to talk in class, and I was like a peacock, so proud to show him off. I even remember when caller ID was new I was so excited because any time I called anyone my dad's name would show up. And even now, even when he came to the office to see the doctor I stopped him in front of every person we passed so I could tell my co-workers that this was my dad.

I can see why she would want to claim to be his daughter. But there's so many things that make it TOTALLY outlandish. First of all, there's a certain amount of class that goes along with being a Hanna. There's a HUGE desire to strive for intelligence and to make something out of your life. We want to be successful, and even if we're not there yet, we don't give up.

My dad's rules for us after we reached a certain maturity were, 1. Always use your best judgement and 2. There are no other rules. Well, most of us know what L's best judgement is, and if she's so convinced that the world is better off without her, she's probably right and she should use more successful methods. (Did that cross the line? I SO don't care. In fact, I think most people would agree with me. If you don't, you don't know enough about her.)

I don't agree with everything my dad does. There are a lot of views that we don't share. But I love him and am so proud of him, and it's disgraceful to him AND to me to have someone like that trying to claim him. She has a hell of a long way to go before she can call him Dad and have it be anything more to him than a flat-out insult.

Halloween

It's a month late, but worth it!

The New Laptop

Yes, believe your eyes, this is a new post. My last laptop died, unwilling to let me post or upload pictures or check my E-mail. A HUGE thank you to Allison and Steve for getting new laptops and giving me their old one, which will be a grand improvement and will help me get back into the blogging world. And thank you also to Jay, for knowing the difference between different cords and for being able to go out and, on the first try, buy the cord we needed to get us up and going again. It would have taken me a lot more than one try, so thank you for saving us time, money and also from me getting so frustrated I pick up and threw our new laptop.

So, my biggest news is that I'm nearing the end of the X-ray class that I have been taking. It's been a LOT harder than I expected, and I'm really nervous about the last two tests, the first of which will be on Dec. 13. However, the X-ray tech I used to work with is no longer at my office, so I have been positioning the patients and having the doctor press the button on the last few X-rays we did. My first X-ray didn't go so well. It was a hand X-ray, which is simple, except that I didn't give the machine enough juice so it was way too light. And I cut part of her thumb off in one view. AND that when I positioned her for the third and final view, I positioned her OVER a lead guard so it didn't appear at all. Opps. And yeah, when the doctor asked me to re-do it to darken it up, I turned the machine down instead of up, so the second X-rays were even lighter than the first ones. Opps. Needless to say, I wasn't too surprised when the hand X-ray we had he next day was sent to the hospital to get X-rays.

I had accepted that the doctor wanted to wait for me to finish my class to do anymore X-rays, when today he called me down to do a forearm. Needless to say, it still makes me nervous and is hard because he's in the room watching me fumble through, but I pulled off a decent X-ray that didn't need to be re-done. Then he had me do a finger. Success. And then another hand. SUCCESS. And then an ankle. That one came out FAR too light, and I was sweating when he asked me to go back in and do it again because my first repeat X-ray hadn't gone so well. But I came back out with X-rays that were as dark as he likes them!!! Instead of lighter than the first ones!!! It's a huge rush when I put up an X-ray that he can use. And all of this experience, though nerve-racking, is going to help me remember so much more on the test than just reading alone can. So we'll see what else he throws at me. So far I'm 3 for 2.

Other than that I'm going to take a couple days to catch this baby up. I know I missed a monthly newsletter for Kami, and we have another month in just a couple days. I may also tell the story of two girls I work with getting let go and making me the head MA. But I'll wait on that one. Don't want to get dooced.